Understanding football talk

I have received many requests for expressions to be explained, I hope that some of the following can help:

"Gutted."	This person is not William Wallace - (Braveheart), or John Hurt - (Alien.)	Very disappointed. Derived from the empty feeling in the pit of one's stomach through disappointment, much the same feeling in the stomach of a "gutted fish".
"On a piece of string."	Doesn't mean that this person is so disappointed with the result that they have put a noose around their neck	This term has been used to tell a player to stay close to his colleague and not go wandering all over the pitch chasing the ball.
"Over the moon."	Not about astronauts.	The person using this expression is very pleased with the team, performance, result, etc.
"Sick as a parrot."	Do not call a vet for this person.	This person is very disappointed. Where this expression has its roots is not known, but a certain Hawaiian Blue Parrot sold to a Mr John Cleese might be a good place to start initial enquiries.
"Box to Box."	This isn't stacking cornflakes at Tesco's.	This is the term to refer to a midfield player who has the fitness and stamina to "run all day" between the two 18 yards boxes. Making defending tackles in his own box and then scoring in the opposition's box.
"Pulling up trees."	This is not a reference to a lumberjack who is okay, who sleeps all night and works all day.	This was used to encourage players not to try too hard to close a player down or overwork themselves in the first half of the match, trying to impress the manager, so they can last the 90 minutes of game - "Don't go pulling up trees!"
"Verbal aggression never hurt anyone."	Verbal Aggression is not a person.	Used whenever playing against London sides and knowing before the game that there is going to be a lot of cockney silly chatter for 90 minutes both on and off the pitch, and this expression when used is supposed to help us take the abuse and not get wound up and bite back.
"Die in the box."	Not to be taken literally. (Tell that to some forwards I have played with! - Ed)	When a cross just passes an out-stretched foot in front of a gaping goal, this expression is used as an exclamation/exasperation that the forward could have given a bit more effort to stretch and score the goal.
"Put your head where it hurts."	Don't lean forward trying to stick your head up your backside.	Similar to the one above, if the ball is knee/waist high and just needs knocking into the goal, disregard all personal safety and the boots flying about to head it into the back of the net.
"Do I not like that?"	This was not first used by Graham Taylor, the former England manager.	This saying was first used by millions of footballs fans when hearing that Graham Taylor had picked Carlton Palmer for an England International......
"In and around near, on and beyond far."	This is not the first line of a Tennyson poem about the Charge of the Light Brigade.	This is in fact instructions to forwards as to where to make their runs when wingers, or full backs, are going to cross the ball into the penalty box - thus covering the two most likely danger areas. The middle of the goal being the "perfect" place, but how many perfect crosses do you see in non-league football?
"Game of two halves."	Not actually stating the rules of football to the un-tutored.	Describing a game where in the first half the team played brilliant and then crap in the second half, or vice versa.
"I didn't see it."	Do not expect this person to book an appointment with the optician on Monday morning.	Mostly used by managers when one of their players is involved in a misendeamour, but the eyesight is back to normal very soon after the incident as they see all the opposition's and official's faults with amazing accuracy. Also widely used by referees.
"Off-Side."	This is not a nautical expression.	Used by players, managers and supporters alike in a very loud voice when there is a goal scored by the opposition or there is the merest opportunity for the opposition to score. By shouting this phrase, it is expected that the goal will not be allowed to stand regardless of its quality or merit. The understanding of this phrase by these people has nothing to do with the rule book on Association Football.
"Out"	Not the quote used by Lady MacBeth talking to blood spots.	This needs to be shouted rather loudly by goalkeepers and defenders as the ball is hacked away from defence and all players have to rush headstrong up the field regardless of where the opposing forwards are.
"Away"	This is not the Fixture Secretary's response to where we're playing Saturday.	This is always shouted by goalkeepers immediately after a corner kick has been taken by the opposition regardless of where the ball is heading and who is likely to head the ball first. "Away" is closely followed by "Out".
"Our Ball"	This doesn't mean that a Mitre Rep is in the crowd demanding his ball back.	This is used probably more than "off-side", because regardless of how obvious it is that a team member kicked the ball out for a throw or corner, all players, management and supporters on both teams then cry "our ball" to whichever official is nearest. The official is then likely to receive abuse from the disgruntled party that he didn't favour for the throw/kick.